I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
