i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
