Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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