Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
