she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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