I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize