If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
