I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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