you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The feeling are messing with the penis
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
