She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize