So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
