: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
time to smoke my breakfast
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
