i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I think im going to throw up on grandma
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
