Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
