is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize