just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
