I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
