We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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