Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
