I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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