Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I have fence marks all over my body
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
