Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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