I'm jealous of your bromance
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
