yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
