Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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