Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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