i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
