THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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