How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize