Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
