i'm signing you up for texting rehab
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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