Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
