In America we eat man semen.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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