Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
