i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
