I want you more than these girls want KFC
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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