Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
