get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
BRING THE BAGELS
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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