dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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