What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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