They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
