Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
