he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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