Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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