Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
That's intense
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
