I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize