Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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