We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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