She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
