I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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