I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize